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You Can Live the Best Year of Your Life.
I’m not sure if you are a fan of New Year’s resolutions or not. There are times that I have fully embraced the idea, thinking “all right, look out world I’m about to do this new thing (insert your thing) only to find yourself on February 1st feeling like a failure. I know I have many many times. So, is your plan to wait until next Jan 1st to try again? That’s 11 months away girlfriend. I want to live my best life now and I do not want to wait.
This year I had a similar experience. I had so many “resolutions” and thought this year is going to be the year that I accomplish so many goals. Here is a few— Learn a language, cut back on the alcohol, lose the menopause middle, eat healthy, move more–you get my point. Well, so far (at the time of writing this, it’s March 25th, nearly a full 3 months, into the “New Year”. I’ve had some wins, many setbacks and once again learned things along the way. What is the best path to living the best year of your life?
Tip #1- If you fail, do not wait to start again, every single day is a chance to celebrate a “New Year” it’s a new day. It could be the start of a week wherever that falls for you.
Tip #2– Never ever give up. Even when you face challenges or setbacks, never stop believing in yourself. There will always be people in your life who will not see your goals and understand them.
Tip #3– Be very clear about what is you want and write down a path for yourself to achieve it. Nobody else can see your vision, nobody else has been through what you’ve been through. You have beaten every single challenge you’ve had up until this point. Cheesy quote alert–If you can dream it, you can chase it!
Tip#4-You are allowed to start small. Start with one thing that you want to change about your life. You know that thing that keeps nagging at you, start with that. Do you want to start eating healthier–choose to add 1 fruit and 1 vegetable to each meal you have and build from there. If it’s to drink more water or add more steps to your day? Start with a smaller, more attainable goal and build on it. One day 6 glasses, the next 7 or one week 10,000 steps a day the next 12,000.
Become a habit stacker, just like me.
In his book Atomic Habits, James Clear talks about habit stacking, and ever since this theory blew my mind, I have been paying close attention to my “everyday” habits. I wake up and brush my teeth, after that, I wash my face and put on moisturizer. This became a perfect time to add a habit like journaling or yoga. When you build on habits you already have it becomes easier to incorporate them into your everyday living. Soon you won’t even need to think about it and you’ll just be doing it. If the first thing you do in the morning is make a pot of coffee–take those 5/10 minutes and use them to stretch or do some squats. It may not seem like much but, getting some movement in as soon as you start your day can set you up to win that day. If you win that day, make a promise to yourself to win the next one, and so on.
I believe I can and will live the best year of my life. Below, I am attaching an ebook for you to challenge yourself to make this year, whether you are starting this on Jan 1st or April 1st, the best year of your life. Click on the image below to grab your copy.
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The Unquiet Bones by Loreth Anne White
This book was unexpected and fabulous. A great listen on Audible too. I was searching for a book with twists and turns and an easy listen. You will not be disappointed and the twist at the end, you will not see coming!
From Amazon: A shocking discovery of human bones reopens an almost fifty-year-old cold case—and rips apart the lives of a group of friends—in a riveting novel by Loreth Anne White, the Amazon Charts and Washington Post bestselling author of The Maid’s Diary.
When human bones are found beneath an old chapel in the woods, evidence suggests the remains could be linked to the decades-old case of missing teen Annalise Jansen.
Homicide detective Jane Munro—pregnant and acutely attuned to the preciousness of life—hopes the grim discovery will finally bring closure to the girl’s family. But for a group of Annalise’s old friends, once dubbed the Shoreview Six by the media, it threatens to expose a terrible pledge made on an autumn night forty-seven years ago.
The friends are now highly respected, affluent members of their communities, and none of them ever expected the dark chapter in their past to resurface. But as Jane and forensic anthropologist Dr. Ella Quinn peel back the layers of secrets, the group begins to fracture. Will one cave? Will they turn on each other?
The investigation takes a sharp turn when Jane discovers a second body—that of the boy long blamed for Annalise’s disappearance. As the bones tell their story, the group learns just how far each will go to guard their own truth.As an added bonus this one in included in Kindle Unlimited if you are like me and cannot wait to get your hands on the next great read. You can check it out and see if it might be for you too. You can check out all of the great books right here. Try it for free for 30 days!!!
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The Keeper of Happy Endings by Barbara Davis
Historical French Fiction…now if you were to ask me 20 years ago, or even last year, frankly I would have said nope, not my jam. I am so glad I am not me twenty years ago and took a chance on something different than usual. This book was fabulous. The characters were so relatable. I stayed up way too late just to see what happened next. It hooked me, and I’m betting it will hook you too!
Here is the description from Amazon:
An enchanting novel about fate, second chances, and hope, lost and found, by the Amazon Charts bestselling author of The Last of the Moon Girls.
Soline Roussel is well schooled in the business of happy endings. For generations, her family has kept an exclusive bridal salon in Paris, where magic is worked with needle and thread. It’s said that the bride who wears a Roussel gown is guaranteed a lifetime of joy. But devastating losses during World War II leave Soline’s world and heart in ruins and her faith in love shaken. She boxes up her memories, stowing them away, along with her broken dreams, determined to forget.
Decades later, while coping with her own tragic loss, aspiring gallery owner Rory Grant leases Soline’s old property and discovers a box containing letters and a vintage wedding dress, never worn. When Rory returns the mementos, an unlikely friendship develops, and eerie parallels in Rory’s and Soline’s lives begin to surface. It’s clear that they were destined to meet—and that Rory may hold the key to righting a forty-year wrong and opening the door to shared healing and, perhaps, a little magic.
Shop here to find it in your favorite form. Right now, it is 67% off, so even better, take a chance on something different.
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Enneagram– Personality Test, Find out your number.
Well, give me a question, and a rabbit hole I will find . Have you ever heard of the Enneagram personality test? I’ve probably been living under some sort of boulder, but I finally came out, and it is sort of mind-blowing. It answers a ton of questions for me and was really interesting to read and try to understand why some of my relationships are more difficult than others. What is your personality type? Why does it matter?
Have you taken one of these tests? How accurate did your results seem to you?
I got lost for a couple of days reading how each personality type interacts with the other. Why is it that some people you meet you just seem to gel with, while others seem to have the opposite effect? It all seems kind of “woo-woo” but it is interesting nonetheless.
I am going to share my results and I hope that you will share your thoughts with me..
Type 9- The Peacemaker
Type 9’s on the Enneagram are often referred to as- The Peacemakers due to their desire for harmony, unity, and inner peace. They are characterized by their easygoing nature, adaptability, and ability to see multiple perspectives. Type 9s seek to avoid conflict and maintain a sense of tranquility both within themselves and in their relationships with others. Their core motivation is to create a sense of wholeness and connection, often by merging with others’ desires and preferences. Driven by a fundamental belief that all viewpoints are valid and deserving of respect, Type 9s excel at fostering cooperation and understanding.
They are typically empathetic listeners, able to empathize with a wide range of experiences and emotions. However, their tendency to prioritize others’ needs over their own can sometimes lead to neglecting their desires and goals, resulting in internal disconnection or inertia. The whole report is 19 pages long and I am sure that is not what you want to do with your time. If there are other Type 9s out there…I feel ya! If you want to find out what your type is you can head over to Blossom Up and follow me down this rabbit hole.
If you are a type 9 like me and find yourself being taken advantage of, walked on or treated poorly just because someone can; pick yourself up, dust yourself off and realize you are stronger than you think, you are braver than you give yourself credit for! And just because I can I’m going to share a little more Dr. Suess because I think he was a little “woo-woo” himself
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Intermittent fasting update-Was it a win?
Update: Four months ago, I embarked on a journey of sorts. I had read an article about intermittent fasting, and I thought,” Well, what-the-he** nothing else is working.” I gave it a go. I was skeptical, but you know I am always game for trying and seeing what you get. What I got shocked me. I started this journey last November. I kind of half-assed it, completely skipped it during Christmas and the holidays, but… And this is a big BUT, in the back of my mind I was always thinking about the hours I last had any calories, meals etc.
For those who have asked, or those who are interested this book right here is where I started.
Now, I am here to give you the update on the progress or the lack-of-progress. I am proud to say there is a number on the scale that I swore I would never see again, and I haven’t.
I am down 17 pounds and 14 inches overall. Better than that, I feel amazing. I haven’t had this amount of energy in years. Here are my takeaways ….
**I love all things related to pasta, potatoes, and bread, so therefore, I will not, for my sanity and for the sanity of those around me, remove them from my diet.
**I like to have drinks—drinks with friends, drinks with my husband and drinks out enjoying mostly anything social. So, cutting out alcohol completely is a no for me.
**I love doing yoga and spending time on my mat, I love getting on the bike and putting some miles in, and I love to get out and walk, especially when winter in Minnesota allows.
Things I do not like: extreme exercise, eating like a bird, not fitting in my clothes, and not ever enjoying a Reese’s again.
After four months, I have hit a plateau, and I am not per se losing any more weight. I am down 17 pounds and holding. I have decided to make some promises to myself and see where I go from here.
- I will drink at least a gallon of water a day.
- I will get at least 12,000 steps a day in.
- I will add more fruits and vegetables to my diet and last but not least
- I will spend at least 30 minutes a day working on self-love. Whether it be yoga, meditation, reading, or just washing my face and using a good moisturizer.
I am going to add these things into my everyday activities and see if there is any change, whether mentally or physically.
Updates to come…. Thanks for coming along on the journey.
Much Love: Mama Mel
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Someone Else’s Shoes by Jojo Moyes
This book took me a bit to get into, to which I usually say, “There are so many books out there, I’ll just try another”.. Let me tell you, I am so glad I didn’t do that. This book was very different from my typical read but, there must have been a reason I picked this one up. I laughed, I cried and it made me think, this could happen to anyone. What a great read.
From Amazon: Who are you when you are forced to walk in someone else’s shoes?
Nisha Cantor lives the globetrotting life of the seriously wealthy until her husband announces a divorce and cuts her off. Nisha is determined to hang onto her glamorous life. But in the meantime, she must scramble to cope–she doesn’t even have the shoes she was, until a moment ago, standing in.
That’s because Sam Kemp – in the bleakest point of her life – has accidentally taken Nisha’s gym bag. But Sam hardly has time to worry about a lost gym bag–she’s struggling to keep herself and her family afloat. When she tries on Nisha’s six-inch high Christian Louboutin red crocodile shoes, the resulting jolt of confidence that makes her realize something must change—and that thing is herself.
Full of Jojo Moyes’ signature humor, brilliant storytelling, and warmth, Someone Else’s Shoes is a story about how just one little thing can suddenly change everything.You can pick it up here in your favorite form. Are you an old-fashioned page turner and like the feel of a book in your hand? Do you read on the go or like to travel with your books? This is my favorite Kindle. I love it because I can read it on the beach or by the pool and the sun doesn’t glare off the screen. If you need to work or clean or get things done while also getting a good book in then you can pick up these great headphones. I listen with the Audible app but the Libby app provides books through your library at zero cost to you.
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Favorite Authors–For your Reading Slump
This Sunday Book Review is going to look a little different. I am going to list a few of my all-time favorite authors. Consider these a place to start if you are in a reading slump or maybe you have never been a reader and was to know where to start to become a book lover like I am. Here are some suggestions in various genres. Choose something that interests you and go from there. Happy reading.
Mystery/Detective
James Patterson: This author has so many books that I cannot pick a favorite. Reading his books got me through the years with young kids. You know what I’m talking about, you sit down thinking you have a few minutes and immediately someone inevitably needs something. These books are easy readers and do not require you to do a ton of thinking, but can transport you and make fall in love with the characters. You can find them all here.
Frieda McFadden: I started out with her Housemaid series (love,love,love) and then realized just how many books she actually has. Check them out right here!
Fantasy
JK Rowling: I couldn’t talk about fantasy without giving props to this woman. She is the goddess of the brilliant Harry Potter series. Once you’ve given them a read, plan a trip to Universal Orlando and feel like you have been transported right into the books. Thank you to my boys for introducing me way back when they were first released!
If you have already consumed this series, my honorable mention goes both to Sarah J Maas A Court of Roses and Thorns Series. Click here.
And Rebbeca Yarros Fourth Wing series found here
These two series combine both the fantasy genre and romance (with a bit of smut thrown in)
Historical Fiction
This genre has quickly become my new favorite. I will give all of the credit to Kristin Hannah. Shop here. I first read The Nightengale. She writes so well that I had to double check if it was fiction. Her books center on a strong woman character during some of the most trying times in American History. I cannot recommend her enough.
If you are more into Nonfiction. I am going to give you a couple books that are both auto biographies and when you purchase the audible version they read it to you themselves. It’s a WIN-WIN
Green Lights by Matthew Mcconaughey SHOP here
Spare by Prince Harry is an interesting dive into a world we know nothing about, even if you aren’t a royal watcher (like my mama)!
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Six Top Tips for a Healthier Diet
I’m going to lead into this post by being very straight forward with all of you. Guess who has always headed straight for the fries, the burgers, the pizza and don’t even get me started on the chocolate. (Reese’s I’m looking at you).Yep- if you picked? You are correct. Nobody I know would think that I would be the person to give advice about the healthy eating train.
I find myself at 53 years old (barely lol) and trying to understand where on earth all of this weight came from. I could always eat what I wanted and not gain a pound. Well, my good people, that ship has sailed and stowed away on the boat is my metabolism.
The time is now to do something about this so I buried myself in the research and I have learned a ton. Now, did the research make me like brussell sprouts? Not a chance, but it has made me a lot more mindful of the things I put in my body and how much. Read on to to see the tips and advice that I have learned and take away what, if anything can help you too.
We all know that some foods are better for you than others. We know that it’s a good idea to limit fast food, eat more vegetables, drink plenty of water, and stay active. The problem is that sometimes, these things are far easier said than done.
There are times where healthy eating feels like an enormous mountain or hurdle to overcome. You may feel uncertain about where to start, how to get going, or what to eat. It is far easier to grab a drive-thru dinner than to think ahead and cook that healthy meal.
The good news is that healthy eating does not have to be hard. Read on to learn what you need to transform your body and enjoy a healthier, happier lifestyle.
Learn About Nutrition
How can you embark on a journey of healthy eating if you have no idea what this actually looks like?
Societal changes, educational limitations, and the availability of fast, convenient food means that many people have no real knowledge of nutrition.
The Internet is always at our fingertips, and it is time to use this wealth of information for good. While there is no need to become a nutritionist, it’s worth taking the time to understand the basics of a healthy diet.
Understanding things like the benefits of carbs, that all fats are not evil, and how certain foods affect your body can inspire you to change your diet. You also have the knowledge you need to move forward with confidence, and as we all know, knowledge is power.
Create A Signature Dish
You can find the recipe for this Green Papaya Salad here.
Another common deterrent from a healthy lifestyle is a lack of cooking skills. But here again, the internet is your friend. Once you understand what should be included in a balanced meal, find a delicious recipe that includes all these elements and perfect it. This will ensure that you have a healthy dish to turn to when time is short. You will also never panic at an impromptu dinner party again!
Batch Cook
Learning to batch cook is another great way to ensure that you are eating healthy, even when life is crazy. Set aside some time to cook a batch of meals that can be easily frozen. When time is short, you can enjoy a freezer meal that is healthy and nutritious. Don’t forget to double-check which items can and cannot be frozen, and always defrost your meals properly before you start eating.
For some great, healthy batch cooking ideas head on over to https://www.organizeyourselfskinny.com/easy-freezer-meals/
Shop Smarter
When you shop, always go with a list, and plan your meals in advance. This will help ensure that you only buy what you need. Fill your cupboards with healthy, delicious snacks rather than unhealthy options. Meal planning and meal prep can be a game changer both for your bank account and for your midsection.
It’s always good to enjoy life in moderation, and eating a bit of chocolate as a treat can be a good thing. Just make sure that it really is a treat and not an everyday occurrence.
Do It For You
Perhaps the most important thing to remember is that you need to make changes for yourself, not for anyone else. This will keep you motivated and on track and allow you to see the real benefits of a healthy diet.
Drink more Water
I cannot stress this enough: most of us are going through life extremely dehydrated. Do you know how much water you should be drinking for your height, weight, and age? I’ll bet it’s safe to say you aren’t consuming enough. Water is essential for your organs to work properly; it also helps you to feel full and perhaps not eat quite as much at each meal. I would say that this is my number one tip, if you do nothing else on this list, add more and more water to your diet.
Here are some tips to get more water in your diet every single day.
https://glossybelle.com/how-to-drink-more-water-every-day/ Final Thoughts
Switching to a healthier diet can take a little prep and practice, but you can rest assured that the benefits far outweigh the stresses. It is a change you will never regret making!
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Fasting for Weight Loss – Setting the Record Straight by Brad Pillon
Paleo eating and vegan eating are the EXACT SAME THING.
This is why any and all research on Paleo diets can be used for Vegan diets, and vice versa.
It’s also why any personal experiences people have had with a Vegan diet can be directly applied to what you will probably experience with the Paleo Diet and vice versa.
I mean, after all… they’re both ‘eating’ right?
I hope this sounds crazy to you, because this is EXACTLY how I feel when people talk about different types of fasting.
‘Fasting’ or ‘Fasting for weight loss’ is a very BROAD description of a style of ‘not eating’, just like ‘Eating’ or ‘Eating for weight loss’ can cover just about any diet in existence.
All fasting is NOT the same, just like all styles of Eating are not the same.
So, I’d like to give you my own way of clarifying this apparent confusion.
These are my own definitions, but they have served me extremely well over the years…
Long-term fasting: Abstinence from food or calorie intake for a period over 72 hours.
Short-term fasting: Abstinence from food or calorie intake for a period of 72 hours or under.
OK, so now that we’ve divided up fasting based on length, let’s look at much more confusing issue – Intermittent Fasting.
Intermittent – Occurring occasionally or at regular or irregular intervals… so really “Occasionally”
Fasting – Taking a break from eating (zero calorie intake) for a predetermined period of time without a necessary interval from one fast to the next.
So Intermittent fasting becomes ‘Occasionally taking a break from eating’
(Pretty simple eh?)
But this is where people get confused… Or at least where I get confused.
If you are spending MORE time NOT eating than you are eating in any given period of time (let’s say a week) why are you calling that Intermittent Fasting?
In my eyes this cannot be defined as taking an occasional break from eating, in fact I think it should be defined as the opposite, and that would be “Intermittent Feeding”.
Intermittent Feeding = Taking the occasional break from fasting to eat during a predetermined window.
There are similar approaches but also very different approaches to fasting for weight loss.
This is not an attempt to disparage this type of approach. Diets that are Intermittent Feeding can be fantastic, helpful, effective, but they can also be in some ways completely different than Eat Stop Eat.
I feel that it’s not accurate to lump them together as the experience of doing a form of intermittent fasting is much different than intermittent feeding.
In my opinion the sub-categories of IF need to make it into our way of thinking.
LeanGains, The Renegade Diet and even some of the more extreme protocols along these lines (like fasting for 20 hours eating for 4 every day) – all can incredibly effective fat loss programs, but in my eyes (and I know you guys are going to hate this) NOT intermittent Fasting. To me they are more accurately described as Intermittent Feeding.
Now, the benefits are very similar – simple, easy fat loss, no loss of muscle mass etc.
The technique is similar; Don’t eat for a period of time.
And they, along with most other kinds of IF probably share about 80% of the supporting research.
But there are also some major differences that I feel is what merits this new definition – specifically the amount of time you are ‘allowed’ to eat, and because the ‘eating windows’ are different, you also have to approach your eating differently. The more ‘extreme’ the Intermittent Feeding, the short the eating window, the more you must eat with ‘purpose’ during that window.
Each style shares some pros and cons, but also have other unique pros and cons.
Sometimes there is research that applies to ALL types of fasting, sometimes it’s specific to one style or the other.
The same goes with personal experience. If someone tells you they had a *great* or *horrible* experience with IF, it would be best to clarify exactly WHAT they were doing – was it IF – Intermittent fasting or IF – Intermittent feeding?
Different, but similar. For many people you can use both depending on your current lifestyle, or even the season of the year. Other people may simply find one style specifically works for them and they have no reason to change it.
If you tried Eat Stop Eat and didn’t like the lack of structure and found it too loose that’s fine, go try LeanGains or the Renegade diet, you’ll likely get awesome results.
Or perhaps you found LeanGains or the Renegade Diet to be a little too much fasting? – That’s fine, try Eat Stop Eat, I bet you’ll love it.
Don’t like any of them? Fine – go eat.. Lot’s of people lose weight eating 5-6 times per day too.
I’d like to challenge your current thoughts on what the definition of IF and “Intermittent Fasting” means. Starting today add “Intermittent Feeding” to your definitions of what it means to take a break from eating and realize that “Intermittent Fasting” really is a different experience than “Intermittent Feeding”. At the very least, I ask you to recognize that there are multiple forms of Intermittent Fasting, and that these forms, while similar, cannot always be lumped together.
BP
I have ventured into the intermittent fasting world and this is the type of thing that is working for me! I love bread, pasta and all of the so-called “forbidden foods. I know I would be setting myself up for failure if I continued down the fiet path that did not allow me to indulge in some of my favorites! Maybe this is the thing you’ve been looking for too? –Mel, your #moxiemama
PS – Of note, anything that is a ‘fast’ but also contains food you can eat during the fast, or a specific amount of calories you are to eat during a fast is no longer a fast in my eyes. It can be a low-calorie diet, or even a ‘cleanse’ but if you have foods to eat, I don’t see it as being the same as a fast.
Brad Pilon has his masters degree in human nutrition and is a Certified Strength & Conditioning Specialist. His trademarked Eat Stop Eat program has been featured all over the Internet and been seen on national television, and has helped thousands of men and women around the world lose fat, gain muscle, and heal their relationship with food. For information on Eat Stop Eat that will help you burn fat while literally doing nothing, visit www.eatstopeat.com
Check this out for yourself! Here
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It’s Not You by Ramani Durvasula, PhD
Narcissism. It’s a word that we have all heard and I’ll bet we each have our own definition of what we thought it was. I am hear to tell you, I had no clue what that word truly meant and how my life has been affected by it. In this book right here Dr. Ramani blew my world wide open and explained so many situations that I could not explain to myself. You’re not crazy after all… Read that again. You..Are..Not..Crazy. If you have found yourself in similar situations, Please give this book a read or a listen. You can also find and follow her podcast here! I am going to be doing a deep dive into this topic and I can’t wait to share all that I find.
Here is the Amazon description:
It’s not always easy to tell when you’re dealing with a narcissistic person. One day they draw you in with their charm and charisma, the next they gaslight you, wreck your self-esteem, and leave you wondering, What should I have done differently? As Dr. Ramani explains in It’s Not You, the answer is: absolutely nothing.
Just as a tiger can’t change its stripes, a narcissist will not stop manipulating and invalidating you, no matter how much you try to appease them. The first step toward healing from their toxic influence—and to protect yourself from future harm—is to accept that you are not to blame for their behavior.
Drawing on more than two decades of studying the landscape of narcissism and working with survivors, Dr. Ramani explores how narcissists hijack our well-being and offers a healing path forward. Unpacking the oft-misunderstood personality, she reveals the telltale behavioral patterns that indicate you may be dealing with a narcissist. Along the way, you’ll learn how to become gaslight resistant, chip away at the trauma bonds that keep you stuck in the cycle, grieve the loss of these painful relationships, create and maintain realistic boundaries, discern unhelpful behaviors from narcissistic behaviors, and recover your sense of self after constant invalidation.
Thriving after, or even during, a narcissistic relationship can be challenging, but It’s Not You shows you it is possible. Dr. Ramani invites you to stop blaming yourself and trying to change the narcissistic person, and to start giving yourself permission to let go of their hold on you and finally embrace your true self.You can grab your copy with the link below
